Home Contests Take the Throne – Win Fable 3 (2nd chance)

Luckily, it's fairly easy to wipe fingerprints off of shrink wrap.

Look, I understand that everyone has to make his or her own decisions. I get it. Do you choose paper, or plastic? Do you stay in school, or drop out and become a crystal meth addict? Do you pay for cable, or borrow it from a neighbor? These are the kinds of tough choices average Americans have to make every day.

Some people, Wall Street types, might look down on choices that rhyme with “stole a copy of Fable 3 from Lamestop.” Sure, they can steal from their coworkers and from the American taxpayer all day, but the second you waltz into a video game store and slip a copy of Fable 3 under you’re shirt, suddenly you’re a criminal. If anything, the big-wig fat cats should be the ones with a house arrest anklet on, not me. And if I paid taxes, I’d be furious with how this country’s tax dollars are spent to demonize people who are just trying to feed their kids.*

But, like I said, we all make decisions. And when you only have enough money to bail your sister out of jail four times a year, video games aren’t a top priority. I mean, they are, just not… “paying” for them.

So if I were to, say, “borrow” a copy of Fable 3 from Gamestop, and then get rid of the “evidence” before the “police” arrest me for “stealing,” all I’m really doing is making a choice. I’m choosing to unload some “hot merchandise” on whoever is dumb enough to participate in my giveaway and “get caught with it long after I’ve fled the tri-state area.”

If at this point you’re still interested in our hush-hush transaction, it only takes a minute to enter the sweepstakes…

The Contest – Two Chances to Win

For your chance to win Fable 3 for Xbox 360, comment on this article and/or on last Wednesday’s original article.

For this week’s post, your comment must answer the question:
Outline the easiest way to steal Fable 3 from your retail establishment of choice.

Simply put, tell us the most effective way of taking from the rich and giving to the you. While the winning entry will be picked randomly, this topic ensures entrants are human and not narcs.

Contest Rules

  • Void where prohibited, limited to persons 13 or older.
  • One (1) entry per person per contest post (maximum two [2])
  • One (1) Winner will be chosen at random by a random number generator
  • Winner receives one (1) new NTSC Xbox 360 version of Fable 3
  • Contest closes on November 7, 2010; Winner announced November 10, 2010
  • Entrants limited to residents of the United States and Canada
  • Winner will be contacted via e-mail address used to post comment
  • Winner forfeits prize if he/she does not respond within four (4) business days
  • WiNGSPANTT and TopTierTactics.com reserve the right to edit rules for clarity

*The average Xbox 360 game disc contains 38 calories.

25 replies to this post
  1. While at the store ask a clerk to see the game in question, and flip it over to the back, turn it on it’s side flip it over again, and then hold it up with one hand and switch hands coming down. To the clerk you seem like a mildly disturbed individual, but in reality you have just secured a fifty pound fishing line. (this may work best on stores inside malls where some vidgames are kept on display behind the registers but not locked up. Make a snappy comment like, “Nah, I never like the first two.” Now all doubt is cast upon you when outside the store you unfold the collaspable fishing pole hiding in your coat and pull with all you might at the huge northern pike of a game called Fable 3.


    Run past the entrance to the E. B. Stop and grab bags coming out, then cloak. Soon surely you’ll find a bag containing the game. (Watch out for pyros!)

  2. First, get a decoy game and put it in the back
    Then, chuck Fable 3 out the door and stand next to the door. Pretend to be astonished that the alarm has gone off when the clerk comes rushing back. If they question you, tell them you don’t know what the heck is going on and that you were simply looking at the game when the alarm went off. Then proceed with the game you asked for from the clerk, but, of course, tell them you don’t want it. Go outside and pretend to be tying your shoe and slip the game in your coat.

    Then start lolling

    #2: Scratch the barcode off when the clerk is in the back and proceed with the rest.

    NO, I have never done these before. This is for pure imagination lolz

  3. There is obviously one sure fire way to steal a copy of Fable 3 from any retail establishment.

    Step 1: Find the brick & mortar of your choice and find a way inside.

    Step 2: Approach the clerk and request the fabled 3.

    Step 3: When he bags the game, hand him some cotton-based parchment, preferably with presidential figures on one side, in exchange for the game.

    Step 4: Calmly walk out of the store and snicker to yourself.

    CONGRATULATIONS! You have manipulated the barter system for your own satisfaction. The clerk believed the degradable, flimsy rags were worth the theoretically infinite amount of entertainment derived from the confines of the fore mentioned game.

  4. 1: Buy something menial at the local video-entertainment establishment, demand it be put in a bag, however small the item is. (Or, request a bag, most clerks don’t pay attention to awkward requests, they are zombies.)
    2: Come back later with empty bag tucked in pocket.
    3: Put fable 3 in bag.
    4. Leave. No one will question a person leaving a video game store with a video game in a bag from that store. If they do, odds are, they were watching you the whole time, in which case, your biggest problem is not being caught for shoplifting, apparently you have a stalker watching you shop.

  5. Step 1. Make sure to buy/steal/manufacture/pull out of your a*# about a kilo of pure Colombian cocaine. None of the imitation junk from those amateurs up north. You’re going to need enough to kill a raging rhinocerus, or Tony Montana (aka Scarface)… Either way, it adds up to about a kilo.

    Step 2. Collect these items from random people across the countryside: the Master Sword, a rubber chicken with a pulley in the middle, the One Ring (you may have to kick a hobbit in the nads to get this one), a 1-Up mushroom, and a used condom.

    [Steps 3 through 72 have been omitted because I think they’re just too obvious to list here]

    Step 73. Congratulations! You have just “earned” yourself a copy of Fable III! Now wasn’t that easy? Just make sure to get yourself plenty of brain bleach for the terrible atrocities you’ve committed in order to procure yourself this game. Have fun!

  6. I find the best way from taking from the rich is to date their daughter/wife, have them be your sugar momma and shower you with gifts.

  7. This is “Hypothetical” of course, and I promise I never did it before but…

    2 man job, one person causes a scene, one person stays out of sight of the scene and removes the disc from the box.

    “Hypothetically” a “broken” ankle when it’s raining/snowing outside is believable enough, and easy enough to fake.

    Don’t gimee that look. What?

    I’m pleading the 5th from here on.

  8. Well, it’s very simple you see.

    Simply: Have a friend who works at a your local retailer, have a Doctorate in Law and also major on Human brain/logic. Use loopholes in the legal system, along with some bribery to safely be able to walk out of the store with game safely in hand while your friend tries to “stop you” When his manager reports you to the authorities, use your Jedi, err, abilities in school to find your loophole and confuse the &%$! out of them. If they persist and attempt to chicken dance (common result of using logic problems) utterly blow their minds by preforming the incredibly simple task of using your telepathy to lift their car off the ground. But you may be asking “Tyler, how the hell are you supposed to do that?!”. Remember when I said to major in the human brain? Well, with that knowledge welled deep within your brain to make them believe that a car or any other large object is floating/being lifted up.

    If you follow those simple steps, Fable 3 should be yours for you to enjoy for an hour, then go back to playing Team Fortress 2/Battlefield: Bad Company 2/Fallout: New Vegas

    (My mentioning of playing Fable 3 for an hour and going back to other games does not mean I do not want to enter this competition. I do. Don’t misread it. The Keyboard lies. Everything does…)

  9. Find a 24 hour place that sells the game and head in about 3AM on a Tuesday night. The crew should be light and fairly zombified from working odd hours. Grab the game off the shelf, tuck it under your coat, and slip out the worker’s entrance using your leet spy skills to avoid the few staff that are actually around.

    Warning: if caught, you may end up with a lifetime ban from the store, so you may want to make a few practise runs at similar establishments without taking anything first.

  10. I’d just disguise as the owner of the store, be polite, be efficient, have a plan to kill everyone you meet, and go home with your newly acquired Fable.

  11. Call upon the forces of Chaos, to twist the realities and storm the building. Sorcerers of the forbidden arts will call upon demons, demons who require a tithing of blood for their dark powers. Rivers of blood will flow as the walls turn to ash, crushing the barriers of protection. The sweet, delicious gaming fruits will be ripe for a frontal assault.

    Whilst this is all going on, put on a novelty glasses nose-mustache combo, sneak in the back during the distraction, and swipe your favorite trinket.

  12. 1)come in the store with a disguise
    2)get near the counter and pretend your looking at a game
    3)listen in on the conversations until you hear a reserve for fable 3
    4)make sure you remember everything he says
    5)then the get to the game store on the reserve day (before the victum ofcourse) in a comepleatly differint disguise
    6)while posing like his relative ask for the copy of fable 3 giving him the info you “overheard”
    7)walk calmly out of the store and when your out of the cameras sight run like hell.

  13. Wait for black Friday head to your local department store that sells video games walmart,sears,target etc. Head for the locked cases which are unlocked at this time because the workers are overwhelmed by soccer moms grab fable 3 stuff in bag, underpants, coat, a baby, whatever then calmly walk from the area oh and if someone tackles you before you leave you’re not going to jail he’s just lonely

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