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Console Warrior

assassins-creed-brotherhood-preview-3-

"Anyone here playing on PC? Anyone?"

Dear TTT,
I have been watching some videos that people made in game consoles like Assassin’s Creed Brotherhood. I want to buy a game console becouse im getting bored of pc and want to play games on stream but my pc sucks and i get errors all the time so can you help me to figure out which console is the cheapest and the best is it Xbox360    or    PlayStation3  and i have another question Can I be able top play on stream with my friends when they’re using another console (like i bought ps3 they have xbox).

-Eureka

Eureka,

For decades, consumers have been embroiled in console wars. Atari vs. Amiga. Genesis vs. SNES. Dreamcast vs. Hope. The cycle always continues. While there is no definitive answer to your question, there’s no reason I can’t make one up on the spot...

The problem is you’ve really set up two distinct parameters here. If you want the cheapest console, a quick search on any fucking electronics website will show you the Xbox 360 costs less than the Playstation 3, probably because the Sony console features Blu-Ray discs and real time weapon change. So if money’s your main motivator, start writing checks to Major Nelson now.

As for your question regarding cross-platform play, the answer is no. Microsoft and Sony have no vested interest in letting you frag competitors over the Internet, and Nintendo isn’t yet aware the Internet exists, so your dreams of continuing the console wars online are unfortunately crushed. However, both the Xbox360 and the Playstation 3 have limited console vs PC capabilities.

On Xbox360, players can play against PC gamers in any game that is an absolute waste of time has also been released on Games For Windows Live. What is GFWL? It’s basically a cross between Steam and Xbox Live, except it sucks. In reality, very few games support this system and nobody really plays the ones that do.

On Playstation 3, Valve has expressed its interest in bringing Steam to the console, starting with Portal 2. This means Sony lovers will be able to play the cooperative campaign with gamers on PC or Mac. This is a great idea, though right now it’s limited to one game, and in general Playstation 3 vs PC connectivity is limited as well.

In short, if you are really concerned about cross-platform play, both systems pretty much suck at it. With price remaining as the only determining factor, the Xbox 360 costs less. So go to your nearest retailer, pick one up, do a 360, then walk away.

Cheers,
WiNGSPANTT

 

And the Number Shall Be Six

Dear Mr. wears-haTTs-in-every-game,

With the release of the pc version of assassin’s creed: brotherhood, many ppl joined the brotherhood, including me. Although I could ask you these questions personally, I’m too lazy to do it, so I’m filling up your column.

Could you give me and any possible reader advice on how to be good at AC:B Multiplayer?
About these points are what interests me;

  1. Are there any fine nuances that make humans stick out so I can look for and avoid doing them myself, like turning unproperly due to terrible keyboard control?
  2. What do I have to do in order to find a game? I got into, like, one game of manhunt which seems to be the only mode anyone plays so that they can grind points.
  3. When and when not to use fast walking?
  4. How many refined does it take to buy the thief’s Italian’s Stovepipe?
  5. Who is to blame if my team got owned by over 10’000 in said game of manhunt, yet I scored most of all?

Also, how can I prevent my bank account from going down so that I may afford a decent pc somewhen this year (serious question trololol)

Yours truly,
Toraka (If you feel dizzy, that’s just the poison)

Dear Toraka,

  1. When you’re in a blended crowd, don’t touch a fucking thing. Your character will walk automatically. If you’re not in a crowd, no amount of walking convincingly will work. Assume you are as obvious as a disguised, uncloaked Spy in TF2.
  2. Pray to Artemis.
  3. In general, you should only use fast walking when you suspect you will come into your target’s LOS soon, or if you’re already in it. If you use high profile while in the victim’s LOS at all, even for a fraction of a second, you will not be able to gain an Incognito +300 bonus. If you know you won’t have LOS on him/her any time soon, you should generally be running closer. Once you’re in range, though, keep fast-walking to a minimum, as it will make you fairly obvious to the sucker you’re about to assassinate.
  4. Just give me all your refined, and you’ll receive the hat in 8-12 weeks.
  5. In general, if your team loses by 10,000+ in Manhunt, it means you were either all terrible or the enemy team was well coordinated. Either way, the blame rests squarely on the shoulders of Binerexis.
  6. Get a job? If you already have a job, I highly suggest buying fewer video games. If you’re not buying many games, I’d suggest giving up something like a fancy cell phone.

Cheers,
WiNGSPANTT

18 replies to this post
  1. i dont have xbox live i dont know y i think it is because i am to young but i want it so i can play with u and u can kick my ass but i am also wondering a few things

    how much microsoft points are the new DLC
    can u type in someones name to be thier friend in xbox or do u have to play a game with them
    and the final question Y R U SO AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. Wing, I am disappoint in you.
    I expected to get a satire mobbing me and my playstyle and family.
    Instead, I got an actually useful response helping me get better.
    What is wrong?

    • He is truly a fickle beast, is he not? But this is how someone as mysterious as WingspanTT works — When you least expect it, he gives you a kernel of wisdom and is gone before you know it (well, before he reappears to tear MvC3 a new one again.)

      • Not quite as many as he’s torn in Bin, though.

        Like seriously.

        If Bin were to spin around in circles really fast, he would be a fertilizing machine.

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